[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3] [Part 4] [Part 5] [Part 6]
For years, the experiences I had with others had a very negative impact on my life. I spent many years clinging to others. I based my faith and hope on others love, acceptance, opinions, and perception of me. I was in search of true love and acceptance that can only be found in Jesus, the one who died for me! I knew this on an intellectual level. On a heart level, I struggled to embrace this truth. How could I let a person I can’t see in, when the people I could see (some even claiming to be examples of His love) hurt me?
My breaking point came about two years ago. I lost my Grandfather. When he passed, my world fell apart. Remember, I had learned to live my faith through others. My Grandfather was a great Christian example. His unconditional love and acceptance impacted my life in a positive way, but when he died, I lost all faith again. Tired of the cycle I was in, I cried out to God. I released all my anger and bitterness in a raging conversation with God. I said, “If you’re there, tell me what to do”. After I was calm, I felt Him telling me “I want you to want me like you want others in your life”.
I began to spend more time in the presence of God. Through the Holy Spirit, I have learned that one of the steps to overcoming the past is forgiveness. I must let go of the hurt and forgive those who have hurt me, used me, and rejected me. Jesus was used for His healing power, hurt, abused, and rejected as the Son of God. The difference between Jesus and humans, is the fact that, as he was being used, rejected, tortured, and finally killed, he said, “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.” (Luke 23:34)
As Christians, when we surrender and become life-long followers of Jesus, He becomes our example of how to live. After we give our lives over to the Lord, we must follow by example. The Bible is very clear on the topic of forgiveness. “Make allowance for each others faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.” (Colossians 3:13) I have to obey and forgive those who have hurt me. “Even if that person wrongs you seven times a day and each time turns again and asks forgiveness, you must forgive.” (Luke 17:4)
So, I must also forgive those will hurt me over and over. I must not hold on to hurt and use it against people. I must let it go and let love cover it! Letting go of the darkest area of hurt and shame has been the hardest thing I have ever done. I lived with years of pain due to being rejected, abandoned, and hurt. I held on to the hurt so tight that I never could reach out and truly experience intimate relationships because I thought I did not deserve such blessings. It is through forgiveness that I was able to let go and allow the Holy Spirit to work.
In my next post, I will share a time in my life that the Holy Spirit changed me! It is the most powerful and vivid experience I have ever had in my life. In one moment, the Holy Spirit changed me forever!! I have decided that my next post will only be available to subscribers of my blog. If you are not currently a subscriber, you can subscribe by submitting your email. You can do this by going to the top right of the page under “Follow by Email”. You will get a confirmation email to confirm that you want email updates. I am honored that you are reading my blog.
No comments:
Post a Comment